My baby and my hair

There's this conversation from college that I sometimes think of and chuckle. My hair was always a little crazy and pretty much always different. I never have been a girl who wears my hair the exact same way every day. Half-up, straight, curly, messy, bun, braids, etc. I admit that I am a much more boring hair person in my new role of motherhood, but the concept still resonates.

The conversation went something like...
Roommate: "how do you do that with your hair?"
Me: "I just figure out how it wants to be... then I help it along."

My roommate then proceeded to laugh at me for a good while, which is I think why I remember it so well. I had just spoken of my hair like it was a separate living creature, so I guess I understand. And I never thought of that as an actual applicable principle then- but it applies to motherhood pretty dead on.

First, a story:
Rory was sick for a week. (she wasn't dying, just bad enough to be clingy and not sleep well enough to get better) And I'm just not very good at slowing down. You know, exercise, shower, get the baby up, make sure all the dishes are done before Rory has finished her breakfast, get her dressed, finish a project, vacuum the floors, plan dinner, make lunch, do more dishes, four loads of laundry, pick up all the toys, wipe counters, pay bills. Oh, you didn't want to hear about the endless chores in my life? Me either. But by the end of Rory's sick week I couldn't handle the rat race with a whiny toddler. So late in the afternoon when both of our nerves were about gone (insert "HOLD YOU" in the whiniest voice possible 20 times the next time you try to make dinner)  I grabbed her softest blank and we cuddled into my bed and watched a movie of her choice. And as we laid in bed and she held my hand that conversation about my hair popped into my head.

What if I were a little more like that with my kid? What if instead of trying to force her to be the exact same every day (i.e. my hair has a little curl today? Cue the straightener) I tried to first figure out what she's prone to be that day, and worked with that instead of against it? What if I slowed down and watched a movie with her when she was clingy and took her to the park when she had too much energy? What if I sat down and gave her five solid minutes of my undivided attention when she needed it instead of ignoring her and pushing forward at half-capacity because she needed me and I didn't want to slow down?

Even with one baby I have an embarrassing amount of days on record where I have tried to force everything to happen instead of listening to what she needs. And to be completely honest, most of the time what she needs ends up being what I need too. (Funny how that works) I'm not saying you should give your child everything they want right when they want it, but I'm learning there is something to giving your child what they need. So here's to publicly admitting fault and committing to be better. To do more listening, and less ignoring needs until I can't deal anymore. I think this probably means more hand holding in my near future. I've always been a believer that if you put the important things first, everything else will fit. And being a mom- like, really being a Jesus following, intentional, kind mom is just one of those really important things that needs to come first.